I wonder why I have to face such a situation here. A month has gone and I haven't yet found a minute I like about life in here yet. Is it because I'm so different or whatever is the reason? I am getting more and more pressure of not being able to move on. I'm afraid to lose and so unhappy when I lose; however, I make no effort to win. So, life has gone down from day to day. Yesterday was this problem, today is another case, and tomorrow gonna be a new disaster. I'm tired of smiling with the pain inside. But what can I do? I'm a heartless-becoming.